Helpless

This is one of my favorite Picasso works.  It is called Blue Nude or Seated Nude.  I have had a framed print of this for years.  It is now hanging over my bed.  I love this painting so much because there is so much this woman could be going through and feeling.  So, it kind of flows with my emotions, as well.  Every time I look at the painting there is a new story that is going on.  Today, the story would be of a helpless woman.  This woman is jobless.  She is having to pay the state back all unemployment benefits given to her because of office politics gone bad.  She is waiting for a decision from the local college on her admission status...but time is running out.  Will she be accepted?  Will she be accepted in time to setup financial aid?  She is putting in countless job applications, but is not given any response in return.  The jobs she is finding are all day jobs.  This means that if she gets accepted into school, she wouldn't be able to take the job because her classes are during the day.  However, she has to pay her bills.  Therefore, ultimately she will have to not go back to school and take the job instead.  She is starving.  This new diet she is on is making her extra hungry and has a constant headache.  However, she can't give up because she paid too much money on the diet.  The diet has been helping her to lose weight.  Every morning she has woken up to a 3 lb loss.  Till this morning, she stared at the scale with only a 1 lb loss.  She should be excited.  It is a loss.  But, is discouraged anyways.  She hasn't heard from the man she loves in over a week.  It is unusual for him to not respond to emails and he said they could finish an important conversation over the weekend.  The weekend and a few days has passed.  She is worried that something has happened to him.  Or worried that the last conversation they had freaked him out and he's shutting her out.  She understands that he might need to think over a few things.  But, doesn't like the silence coming from that direction.  She has started a tutoring program at her church.  Yet, with everything that is going on...she hasn't been motivated to do the things that need to be done.  She should have decorated and prepared the room already.  Her laundry needs to be done and her house needs to be cleaned.  However, with the headaches and all the stuff on her mind...she has not begun to try to start.  She needs to, though, desperately.  She is feeling helpless today and would rather strip down to her naked self and curl up in the fetal position.  She isn't feeling sorry for herself.  She is too strong to be doing that.  However, she is feeling a bit helpless and alone.  She knows she should take a shower and go out and enjoy the day.  She should get dressed and go sit outside with a book.  She is pondering upon that possibility.